Clarinet

My daughter joined a clarinet class two weeks ago when I was reading Angela Duckworth's Grit. There are two powerful lessons I take from this book.

First, we need grit but we can quit, as long as we don't quit on a bad day. I still remember signing up my daughter for a music class when she was about three years old. Like a lot of parents (and not necessarily Tiger Mother), I had a secret wish that my girl will commit to music and piano. She tried and struggled. We didn't quit until the term (and that lasted for more than two years) was over, the tuition payment was up, and the end-of-the-term performance had been done. She didn't quit till the day we'd committed ourselves. Phew!

The uncertainty about if my daughter likes music was disturbing to us. So disturbing, in fact, that for the last one year, my wife and I didn't sign her up for another musical lesson. The decision to try clarinet came after a discussion of various other classes my daughter could have chosen. She didn't even have to pick one. Not a must.

The second lesson from Grit is nobody works doggedly on something they don't find interesting. Before hard work comes play. A degree of autonomy during the early years is conducive to building passion in the long run. Clarinet is an instrument of my daughter's choice. As it turned out, we needn't have worried. At the start of her clarinet class, what she needs is encouragement and freedom to figure out what she enjoys. Yes, she needs to practice. But not too much and not too soon. My daughter adjusts well to her daily practice. And daily small wins, I wish.