Bump

I found out recently that, among all those characters in the Mr. Men series by Roger Hargreaves, my wife loves Mr. Bump the most, ever since her childhood.

It didn't take me long to realize the reason.

For those of you who haven't read the children's literature of Mr. Men, Mr. Bump fell out of his bedroom window and bumped his head, leaving him wrapped up in bandage and loss of his memory. He keeps his looks after the injury and just can't help having accidents, including being cleaned in a car wash.

People might rightly scratch their heads and wonder how on earth Mr. Bump can bump into so many silly blunders. But trust me, I am no better than Mr. Bump. Throughout these years, my habits of imprudence ensure that not a week goes by without having accidents like mixing up shampoo with bathing lotion, wearing my roommate's spectacles after getting up and nearly ending up like Humpty Dumpty.

Flannery O'Connor said that anyone who has survived childhood has enough material to write for the rest of his or her life. Now, come to think of it, someone like me who have survived as a Mr. Bump should have enough to write in the next life.

Being a Mr. Bump is not so difficult, but quitting it is nearly impossible. This is not to say that my wife made a mistake in marrying me. Far from it. It's me who made the mistake during our wedding ceremony. No, don't get me wrong; I am not saying that I put the wedding ring on the wrong person's finger (Bump!). I simply put the wrong ring (mine instead of hers) on my wife's finger in front of all my guest friends.